Quarter Life Crisis: You're Cold Busted!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

I turn 25 this year and resting in a the comfortable grey area of a 'quarter life crisis'. To celebrate, for the next few weeks of September, I'm recapping some of my favorite albums and singles that are turning the big 2-5 along with me...

Usually diss songs I find lamer than lame, but that's because nothing compares to Oran "Juice" Jones' "The Rain" which is the godfather of diss songs. Though cussing is therapeutic for me, this song is void of those four little word gems, and well, it proves that your mother was right all along---you can always find another word (s) and Oran "Juice" Jones has a lot of them to say about his gold digging dame.

Even though the lines about following his cheatin' girl  and "doing a Rambo" on her sound like they come from a graduate of the Chris Brown Appreciation For Women Academy, but I guess, a man's gotta know his limitations a la Dirty Harry. Along with Alexander O' Neal's "Fake", "The Rain" calls out the age old gold diggers and fakers long before other R&B men and rappers with the last name West did so, and well, he has every right to do it. A former Navy officer, Oran "Juice" Jones was the first artist signed to the newly formed, Def Jam Records. "The Rain" reached #9 on the Hot 100 chart, and sadly, this was the peak of Oran's career, though he has released albums following his big hit.

So what are the best disses?
  • Get on outta here with that Alley Cat coat wearing, Hush Puppy shoe wearing crumb cake I saw you with!
  • I was about to jam you and flat blast both of you, but I didn't wanna mess up this thirty-seven hundred dollar lynx coat
  • I gave you things you couldn't even pronounce!
  • You without me is like corn flakes without the milk!
Hysterical stuff.

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